Tuesday, September 2, 2008

wherein I attempt to exhibit my commitment to blogging by blogging about my fear of commitment

So . . . because you are scurvy with ramble-deficiency and wondering what is happening in my life . . . or more probably just because I need to write . . . I will see what I can remember and report that may be of interest. Or not.

Yesterday was Labor Day, which I celebrated by walking. A lot. My day kind of went like this: Sleep. Sit. Walk. Sleep. Sit. Walk. Shower. Go to bookstore. Sit. Walk. Waste precious hours I could have spent sleeping nattering about on Facebook. Walk. Sleep. Fascinating, yes?

It was good, though. Just a day.

Not sure what to do about my life. I have a few things rolling around in my head but haven’t really zeroed in on a course I feel drawn to. Well, there is one. But I’m waiting for the pull to grow a little more barbed before I admit to myself that I am hooked and reeled in.

Other than that . . . I realized today that I need to commit to a single piece of literature. A friend asked, So what are you reading? and I rattled off about five books that I am dabbling in. That’s my problem. I’m a dabbler. A dilettante. What happened to the commitment of my youth, when I could read an entire Babysitter’s Club novel in a day? {Pause to allow the awestruck gasps to quell.) But seriously, do you feel me, people? Nowadays I read a sentence or a paragraph and then I stop to think. What happened to that me who was all Absorption? When did Reflection hijack everything?

So . . . enough outposts from my demented psyche . . . back to filtering out all the mung and gunk I like to hold up and call a self, and trying to see if there is any nubbin of basic goodness lost in there somewhere. Life is just easier when we think about other people, isn’t it?

2 comments:

Kevin said...

Great title hahahaha.

Aren't we all still trying to figure out what we wanna do when we grow up?

Or is it just members of our family.

Hope you are doing alright :0)

Crittergal said...

Nope, I think it's pretty much everybody. Except Dad maybe. I think he's figured it out. Now if we can just get him to grow up a little bit... :-) Just kidding - love you Dad! You grew up, you just don't grow old. :-)